A New And Profound Friend

Today I met a new friend to say the least, a profound and intelligent woman with the most funniest sense of humor. She is a little older than myself and much wiser of coarse. Originally from the Dominican and is a latina as she calls herself, she has been in America for 9 years and speaks good english, at least I think so. I was introduced through a mutual friend as someone to help her with her english while achieving her second Master's Degree. Little did I know that she would teach and give me some of the best knowledge of and stranger I have ever met. I had no idea that four hours and helping her with her english could be so much fun, but it was and I had the best time. We talked about life, love, relationships, we teared up a little, laughed a lot, and it was some of the best times with a complete stranger that I have ever spent. I feel as if I have known her my whole life and that I am supposed to know her, for what reason I'm not sure but as time moves us forward I am sure the reason will become evident. I was absolutely scared to death to help someone with whom I had never met before with something so important, but as soon as I seen her I felt completely calm and at peace. I truly am so thankful to have this opportunity to help someone with such a small but wonderful learning experience, but I am so sure I will learn just as much as she will during this journey. I am glad I have this opportunity to do something good but I feel so much more lucky to be able to know such a wonderful person. I am utterly humble and blessed because of this experience.
SN:: I have never been so reassured that something I was doing could make a difference until today...She asked to read my blog. #PROUDMOMENT

My Heart's An Open Book

I am a private person especially when it comes to being in a relationship but there comes a time when you should let people know how you feel. The decision has been made I will let you know how I feel through writing it, then maybe you can truly understand the way my heart feels. Things haven't always been made clear on either one of our ends but I have tried to be completely honest with you about my feelings. For awhile I wasn't single and neither were you, I know I made it hard for you to be there, through some of my not so great relationship decisions. However, the past is the past for the both of us, and now more so than ever I want to let you know how I feel. If the opportunity ever presented itself for us to really talk about what's on our minds, then it would be a great time to discuss all the things that has taken place the last couple of years. I feel discouraged as of late because I have tried telling you how I feel but I think you tend to just tune me out, being that you probably feel like I may not mean what I say. So today my heart is an open book for you and it is being nothing but absolutely honest, as I am saying what it truly feels out loud. I happen to love you and I never stopped during the last couple of years, even if you think otherwise. I care about you and I want you to be happy no matter what the circumstances are. I know that words are nothing without actions but I need the chance to show and prove to you through my actions that I am honest with my feelings. Like I have said previously, you have had a part of my heart since we first met and nothing has changed that. I know it may be hard for you to accept these things that I am making public but there comes a time when everyone must be open to accept what they may not want to. In case you were wondering I really do love you and never have I stopped. <3

Ladies We Are The Standard

Men are stuck in this world of there own thinking that their expectations is the cream of the crop. Them having this mind made up opinion of how to treat women and what they expect from women is there fault but ladies it is also our fault as well. A lot of women including myself at times have given a man the opportunity to act like a fool and treat us any kind of way. So with that being said if we as women allow them the freedom to treat us as they wish, then we can kiss a good relationship goodbye and welcome the drama and foes of a bad relationship. Men shouldn't expect us to give and give while they just take and take, but we allow them to do that. We as women have to be the deal breakers, the standard, the strong women we really are, and let them know our worth. We have to teach them exactly how to treat us and love us, but most of all that they have to RESPECT us too. We can allow them to continue on a road of bad standards or we can make them understand that we are the standards and we demand to be treated like the Queens we are. So from now on ladies remember that it is truly up to us to set the standard of how men will treat women by being the standard, and teaching them how to treat you. We as women have more power than we realize, so from now own ladies use your power to be the standard and make the men in this word learn the standard.

The Past

When the past rings the doorbell or knocks on your front door, do you answer it or just leave it closed? If you open the door it will probably make the things you do not want to see of your past visible, but will also give you understanding to why the past is truly the past. However leaving the door closed may be you just shutting all thoughts of the past out or what no longer is apart of your life. Maybe you do not want to invite those memories or people of the past back in your life because they don't deserve to be there, or you no longer want them there. The truth is we can't change what happened, the past is the past. We can however make ourselves more aware so that the future can in turn take a different direction. My past is something that I do not want in my future, he broke my heart and wasn't the best man for me. Although the doorbell is louder than ever and the knocks on my door haven't went away, it gets easier day by day. Sometimes it's hard because you want to know what those knocks mean and why they are continuous without end, but it is also better to just take the lesson as learned. Move forward but make sure that you face the past and realize it for what its worth, because you can't truly move forward until you accept the past completely. I can allow my past to be a friend nothing less and nothing more because I have accepted it for what it is worth. I also know that my future is going to have a better story line than that of the past and I have something to look forward to. One thing is for sure I will love my past for the rest of my life, for it made me a better person and a woman who is truly knowing of her worth now more so than ever.

Secret Single Behavior

Everyone has secret single behavior while they are living the single life. Some behavior is the rarest of rare and some behavior is rather normal for someone living single without a significant other. I have definitely gained some new secret single behavior habits of my own the last few months, normal to me yes, but I don't know if I would tell the world about them. Having your own behavior is fine and definitely a comfort for someone living the single life, for me its just a way of me being able to relax and be myself. Wearing men's basketball shorts and a tank top watching Sex And The City and writing every quote detail for detail in my secret pink book, is a simple thing that keeps me so entertained. Blogging half dressed in my brightly colored victoria secret undies and a SubCon tshirt, while laying in my fluffy bed is a small piece of heaven for a mere moment in my chaotic single life. Sometimes I bake brownies and eat half the pan while reading my best friends blog or flipping through every fashion magazine I own, sitting on the hard wood floors in my downtown apartment. No matter the behavior and the extent of its normalcy, these behaviors that we single people have are just that, single people behaviors. These behaviors will not last forever just until the single life happens to be interrupted by that relationship that let's us not be so secretive anymore. One thing that's not a secret anymore is my single behaviors because I just shared them whole world, so what's yours?

As We Grow

As time passes and we grow into the better fit of ourselves, we all have those parts about us and our lives that change. We grow up and there are things about each of us including myself that will not stay any part of the same. There are some things that will not change but stay the same about each of us and make us the people that we long to become. From the time that I was a little girl to this very moment of my life plenty of things have changed. For instance when I was a little girl I was certain that I was going to marry Prince or Michael Jackson but neither of those things happened. The person that I am now is more mature in this day and time and a bit more wiser because of the journey that I travel daily and will continue to travel as life moves me on. As time passes certain things that were once important to us become less important and other things become more important. The last few years of my adulthood I have learned family and friends are the pillars of strength, that will remain the most constant in my life. Falling in love and falling out of love will happen more times than once and each love and heartbreak is apart of life. We learn what kind of love we really want through those many different relationships beautiful or not, they define the intricate details of our hearts. One of the biggest lessons I have learned through my growth as a human being, is life goes on, that's the beautiful part of any situation it will go on even if you think it can't. So as we grow and evolve into those people that we long to be, learn to appreciate the journey because its that thing that changes us the most through it all.