Guys.....Learn To Get To Know Women

I am not a man hater nor am I a man pessimist but there are some things that I have a very strong opinion about. In today's day and time men seem to be creatures from a different planet. They for the most part prove to be on a totally different page than women and reading in the words in a different language too. Most men claim to know everything about the female population but in reality they have no idea about women. A certain guy made a comment today and if he was in my presence I would have laughed in his face because really he has no clue about women. He said "all women basically want the same thing, they want a man to be there for them". I highly disagree, not every woman is the same and men definitely need to get to know the needs and wants of a female , instead of thinking they know what we as women are all about. Men are hard to read but if a man can't read a woman, he may not stand a chance in ever being with her. Guys, knowing what kind of handbag to buy or flowers she likes is not important in comparison to what you should really know about a her. Knowing how to treat a woman and respecting her mind, body, and every part of her is a big key to getting to know the real her. After all a woman's virtue is a mans greatest glory. Being her friend before all else and showing her that its not all about the physical aspect of a relationship , but instead about building a strong foundation , may actually be the key to the best relationship any couple can have. One of the most important things is showing a woman that certain kind of love, the inconvenient, consuming , can't live without each other real love. Showing her that love lets her know beyond everything else that she is truly important to you. To truly know a woman and her worth, is to love her in more ways than one. So guys listen up there is no need in all the talk about what you think you know, instead get to know the woman you want and remember actions speak volumes when trying to impress that special woman.

Girlfriends That Are Soul Mates

Sometimes you have those girlfriends that you have the most care free friendship with and not much effort has to be given to keep things blissfully happy. They are those girls that complete your life and remain true throughout any situation. Sometimes people come into your life for a season but girlfriends come into your life for a reason and stay an entire life time. My girlfriends are the women who truly make my life so much more worthwhile and are definitely my soul mates. There is a friend with whom I met as of late through twitter of all places, and I most certainly consider her a girlfriend now. She and I hit it off immediately, we have fashion, simple treasures, and most of all Sex And The City in common, we are totally in sync with every reference of SATC. So I hope to one day meet you GiGi from St. Louis but maybe we can meet in LA or NY, those cities are more suitable for two SATC girls like ourselves. I never expected a person who has never met me to volunteer to create a new blog layout for me, without me even asking. My blog is definitely a big part of who I am and who I long to be, you allowed the new layout to represent exactly that. I thank you GiGi for your amazing gesture, it was one of those simple pleasures in life that creates the best happiness. I am humbled through you being a kind and gracious new girlfriend with whom I can call my soul mate. "Maybe we can be each other's soul mates and then we can let men be these great nice guys to have fun with". <3
P.S.
You cry Dior tears and I cry Chanel tears...As long as they're couture tears.

A Statement So True

Have you ever had you opinion or judgment about someone you didn't even know, and after really getting to know that someone your simple opinion was proven all wrong. "Do not judge a book by its cover" is definitely a statement that holds true meaning. Many times I have learned the lesson of that particular statement but recently I have learned it again and it meant something totally different than what it usually means to me. Sometimes we are very deceived by someone's actions through first impressions which later leads to deception because we had a good impression than we should have had of a person. Then other people seem to surprise us when our opinions of them are a little harsh but the person themselves turn out to be something special. After months of knowing someone but not really getting to know her I have learned an extremely important life lesson as well as the not judging a book by its cover lesson once again. I had my opinion already set in stone and made up because of her attitude she once presented to me and I knew if it was bad the first time it couldn't be good the second time. However, after truly talking to this girl she was absolutely a great person on the inside, a diamond in the rough you could say. Her battles in life has truly made her the person she is, like myself she is every bit of the woman she is because of her life. I can truly appreciate the honesty about a human being when I am able to hear the truth from that person. I feel like knowing what I do about her life through what I have learned from her, now I can appreciate the person she is more. So the next time instead of judging someone I will remember to get to know them first. People including myself should learn to treat each person as a treasure because everyone has there own story to tell and a lesson to teach from it. I for one know that first hand because of my story that my life allows me to tell and I can truly learn from someone else's too. So the next time you start to judge a person by their outer shell remember the inside could be beautiful just like the colorful pages of a book through the story it tells.

The Last Single Girl

On Saturday I will be attending a wedding as a date less single girl. The last three weddings I attended I caught the bouquet but still no luck, just a failed engagement that ended last fall. So by now I am thinking maybe I will be single for the rest of my life or maybe Mr. Big hasn't walked in my life yet. As I watch everyone around me in happy relationships or in love, I continue to wonder am I really the last single girl? Before I ended my last relationship in the fall I was that girl who watched everyone around me live a single life and be very happy doing so. Now almost everyone that was single at that point is now happily in a relationship. I actually became the single girl that I use to be friends with and all my friends became the not single friends that's friends with that single girl they use to be. As I am a very happy single woman in my very single life, I must say I choose to be single because the right one hasn't yet come along. My being single is certainly not because guys aren't attracted to me, its just merely the fact that I haven't found a guy that I would want to date. As the past seven months have definitely allowed me to meet some very handsome and great gentlemen, they just haven't been the one for me. Being single for the time that I have, especially after a very dramatic relationship has definitely made me fall in love with myself and love myself even more than before. I have learned that being in a relationship isn't everything its cracked up to be. I actually know people that are in relationships that would rather not be and the people not in relationships that want to be in one and when they finally are in one, they realize its not everything they thought they were missing. So until I find someone who is worth me and my time, I have absolutely no problem being the last single girl at that wedding wearing a label less dress and styling it up with some shoes.

New Beginnings

We all at some point in our lives have experienced new beginnings. The new beginnings may be new relationships, friendships, or just life. Starting over or starting something new is definitely exciting and scary, but all worth it too. It means being able to experience something you never have before and being able to truly appreciate a new opportunity. I have had many new beginnings in my life and have experienced first hand just how wonderful something new can truly be, when its fresh and new. So whenever you are blessed or lucky which ever you so choose to be and are able to experience a new beginning be open to it. New beginnings aren't bad and doesn't necessarily mean that something bad has happened to allow you to start over, it just means there is something even better to look forward to. With everything new in your life that you are able to experience always make it worthwhile because with each experience comes some of the best lessons and blessings life has to offer. Remember in life every ending is a new beginning.

To my best friend Heather or as the world knows you Herfection ....Happy Relaunch Day! I hope your party tonight be filled with lots of happiness and a new beginning that you will never ever forget, I only wished I could be there. You are so much of the reason that I write this blog.....Thank You. <3

Missing Them

I miss people just like everyone else does, but it just so happens that my two best friends with whom I miss the most happen to not be at finger tip reach anymore. They aren't at the grasp of my want and I can't just go to there house for a visit to make me feel better. It has been a whole month since I seen Monique and was two months since I seen Heather last until this past week. Being without those two is like being without water when I'm thirsty, my mouth parched and feels exceptionally dry. They are the two most fresh breaths of air on days that seem like air just isn't sufficient and they give me sun light on the rainiest of my days. Who would have ever thought that I would have to be without them at this point in my life, when I had them both for so long. With missing them the not so happy days definitely seem like some of the longest days I'll ever have and on the happiest days they are still a phone call away and not a personal visit away. However, when I have either of them here life is exactly how its supposed to be and I don't have a care in the world. When both of them are gone or leave, I don't lose them all in one day, I lose them in pieces over time, kinda like how the sun stops shining from fall to winter. The thing I remember the most is there laughs and oh how I hate it when they leave after a visit and I can't hear it perfectly anymore. I am not completely empty because I still have them in my life and I feel so very lucky to be able to have them at all. Until next time my two bests I love the both of you like there is no tomorrow and miss you two terribly. <3
P.S.
Heather you totally made me want to pack my ish and go to New York with you, when you were home visiting this weekend. Hearing you talk about its potential, how you never want to live anywhere else, and how in love you are with the life of the city almost made me drop everything in my life here. Even though my life is quite lovely and has its own sex and the city aura, I almost wanted to find that potential there just like you have. I hated seeing you walk away and saying bye to you last night but there are plenty visits ahead to look forward to...<3

My Forever Friend

Two of my best girlfriends live away, one in another city and the other in a completely different state. While I miss them both very much, the time we spend apart makes the time we are able to spend together more appreciated. My best friend with whom I have been friends with since the 4th grade came home today for a visit for her upcoming birthday. My schedule is usually hectic and I usually have some conflicts of interest, however, today's agenda happened to be convenient because I was able to pick her up from the airport. The anticipation made my nerves insane because I hadn't seen her since December. As I rushed in to find her she was at baggage claim, as soon as I seen her I was calm and the happiest I had been in awhile. She was finally back again and at that moment I realized how much I had truly missed her. We played catch up with our two separate lives and had some laughs over lunch that I won't forget. Her laugh is something that I have missed most about her, it is pleasantly intoxicating and today I got to hear it clearly, not through the phone but in person. Everything in my life seemed like perfection because she was there to share those laughs with me. I appreciate every second of the time I got to spend with her but most of all I appreciated not having to miss her anymore because she was right there in front of me, living in the same moment that I was living in for a change. I won't ever be able to describe how lucky I am to have her or anybody that I truly love and care for in my life but I can tell you this, every single human being that I love in my life are priceless. True friends are hard to find, even harder to leave and even more impossible to forget. She is all of that to me and so much more and will always be because she is my forever friend. <3
P.S. If you ever read my blog its because of you that I wanted to create it. I know it will never come close to comparing to yours but its something that I love and through you and your blog I gained so much of the passion that I have for it. Thank You. <3

A Product Of Our Environment?

Are we really a product of our environment? Someone that I was having a conversation with the other day said to me that he believed we are products of our environment. I want to say I beg to differ in that reasoning. Being a product of the environment in which you were raised is almost like saying you are what you were raised in. A couple of different scenarios, a girl that use to be a good friend of mine her parents had great jobs, they lived in a wonderful house and they raised her well. However, she is always trying to be what she wasn't raised to be, a rebellious girl who lives on the edge and doesn't seem to care where her life is going. Another great example of not being a product of the environment in which you were brought up in, a guy that I know had a rough upbringing and should have been on the path of self destruction and becoming what his environment was. Instead he excelled in basketball, got a college degree, is now successful, and happily married. Lastly I will use someone personal and close to home, myself, I haven't lived with my mother since I was 5 and my aunt and her husband raised me to the best of there ability. My mom wasn't the best person, however, I do love her but everyone was expecting me to be who she was self destructive and on a path to nothing good. I proved them wrong I graduated high school and tried the fashion school thing. I am successful in the work that I do, I work hard, and I have a wonderful life. I fell in love and that was an accomplishment because it was something that she was never able to do. I found true happiness and peace within myself that makes my life wonderful on a daily basis. I became one strong woman and it wasn't because my environment taught me to be, instead it was because I was a determined enough individual who put all my potential to great use. So really its rather overrated to say you are a product of your environment because simply proven, not everybody is.

My Three Best Guy Friends

There have been people that I haven't seen at all since graduating high school. Although some people I could truly live without seeing for the rest of my life there are a few that I wouldn't mind catching up with at all. I had the opportunity of catching up with a few of them the past week and it was some of the funnest moments in my adult life that I have had. Two of them I hadn't seen in 7 years since we graduated and one of them I have seen within the past couple of years but as of late hadn't seen him at all. Its within those moments of the last week that I have been able to catch up with three of my best guy friends in the whole world that I haven't seen in years. The four of us are truly all grown up now living our lives and doing our own thing. However we were still the same fun people that we were before we graduated and went our separate ways. Phillip (Adonijah) we shared a locker for three years, it was well worth every bit of the hassle we went through fighting over space. That lion is still apart of my life and every time I look at it I think of you. Thank you for the turning me onto the new Starbucks drink and also being my Hookah partner for the very first time in both of our lives. I enjoyed sharing the my downtown Sex And The City Life with you. You will be my best guy friend forever. Dominick what can I say, when you walked into the room the other night that chemistry we have had since freshman year for about 11 years now is still there, my heart fluttered. That chemistry will probably never leave either one of our lives. You still make me that giggly girl that I always have been around you and will always be when I am around you and vice versa. I love you absolutely until the end of time and I'm down for you because you are down for me. I feel completely lucky because all the girls use to want you but I had you and your friendship wrapped tightly around my fingers. Jamal even though you are "THE UNC" graduate I still love you though I'm a Duke fan usually. Getting in those window displays in Belk or any store won't be the same without you, while you are gone to the Army. However, future Starbucks and window display adventures will be a total laugh and something I can't wait to do. Your twitter will totally be filled by me when you are gone :-)! I love you Mr. Ooh Na Na What's My Name!!! You three guys will I believe for the most part be a part of my life forever. Though Phil and Jamal will continue to live away the reunions will be great. Dominick you are back and I'm here and we will continue to have Dom and Cee time! I love you guys without an end, thank you for the laughs as of late and forever! Love, The All Grown Up Candice turned Super Model <3

New Conversation

Ever heard the saying when one door closes another door opens? How about the saying when someone walks out of your life someone else will walk in? Well I believe when good conversation walks out new conversation will walk in and may be even better than the conversation that previously walked out. There can be people in your life that you talk to but people that you have good conversation with are sometimes hard to find. I have been fortunate in finding great conversation but also less fortunate to have great conversation leave as well. As of late a few conversations have left that I do miss but there have been a few to introduce themselves to my life. I must say it has been a pleasure being able to get to know these newly introduced conversations. I have been allowed to laugh and giggle uncontrollably about random things that these conversations bring. The conversations have taught me new things about the people in them and I have been able to share a few things myself. These conversations don't have topics they are just go with the flow and whatever happens to come up we just talk about it. That's the fun and entertaining part, being able to let whatever there is to talk about just come out. The even better part about these conversations is that they allow myself and the other person to be honest about the talk at hand and to say whatever it is we want to say. Whether these conversations are ones that will last or ones that will walk out to let others walk in, they will definitely be interesting ones filled with new lessons and plenty of giggles.

To Tell The Truth

As human beings sometimes telling the truth may be a bit of a challenge but the truth must be told. In my book being truthful and completely honest is always the best route to take. A straight and narrow path that takes you straight to the truth or long and winding road which can eventually lead to a lie, which do you choose. As most people have, there have been times that I found myself wanting to tell a lie rather than the truth because I thought it would make the situation easier or go away quicker. In reality me telling a lie would have only brought hardship to a situation that would have taken its time getting to the truth in the end. The truth hurts at times but no matter how bad the truth hurts, it is always better to be hurt with the truth than to be killed by a lie. Though there are moments of debate, for some situations telling the truth is all we have to give and makes the most sense. For other situations we tell the truth because we just can't help ourselves and naturally what we say just happens to be the truth. There are those times that we should tell the truth because we owe at least that much to a particular person or situation. In the end it is easy, telling the truth can be rather simple, sometimes we need to say it out loud to hear it for ourselves.

Pretty Is As Pretty Does

The statement is very true pretty is as pretty does. I speak for everyone man or woman when I say this, what is on the inside of you is makes you the most attractive. Ladies remember if you act like a lady you will attract a gentleman and gentlemen if act like a true gentleman you will attract a lady. Your morals, the way you carry yourself, and your self respect makes you the most attractive. All the time I hear you are so pretty or so beautiful and while I am thankful and appreciative of these compliments, I also want to let people know the outside of me doesn't come close to comparing to the beauty on the inside of me. The make up I have on, my shoes, and clothes make me look pretty on the outside but the inside of me surpasses all outside attractiveness that you will see. Knowing my self worth and who I really am will make me far more prettier than the way I look on any good or bad day. The way you dress, what brands you wear, and how your hair looks are only the facades that make you pretty, inner beauty will outshine these things on any day. Pretty on the outside surely doesn't mean pretty on the inside, you can be a fly person with the best swag ever and be dark on the inside. When you are happy on the inside it makes you beautiful on the outside and no matter what, your true colors will always come to the surface. When you want to be truly attractive be who you really are, the real you because it is much better to be the real you than the fake somebody else. Remember human is absolutely beautiful and perfect is absolutely boring.

Sometimes Relationships End

When committing ourselves to a relationship, we never really think about relationships ending but sometimes they do. The endings of the things we love so much can definitely be heartbreaking but sometimes the endings to these things can also be a relief and a journey to new happiness. Though we truly love the people we embark on these relationships with we can also resent them at times because of the strain that they put on the relationships we have with them. Granted no relationship is going to be perfect and you will fight some of the hardest battles in them, however, we also have to remember that some relationships are not worth being continuously unhappy for. When the drama and hurt become too much it may be best to just let it be over. Learning how to let what's not meant to be just be over will not only make you feel better, it can also be the best for you in the long run. Though some things end it doesn't mean that nothing good will come from those things that we once loved. Learning the lessons of the experience itself will make you a better person and also give you guidance for future relationships. Let relationships be what they will be, accept the change within them and don't be estranged. I speak from experience when I say that sometimes its better to let go than hold on because holding on to something can definitely hurt worse and break your heart more in the end. When your heart gets broken remember it is the nature of hearts to break, it is part of there job description. We as human beings will have our fair share of heartbreaks but its how we handle those heartbreaks that makes the difference.

To one of my best girlfriends whose relationship just ended, it is your time to be happy again. With this new start I hope you find all the things that brings immense joy to your heart. Some man will one day appreciate all of you and everything you have to offer. You will one day find the love that completes your life, when you find it you will know it and it will be yours to keep forever. <3

Make Yourself Happy

Putting others before yourself, trying to please everyone, or doing for everyone but yourself, we have all done it but when does it end. There are times that giving is more rewarding but there are also times when the giving gets taken for granted also. So how do we tell the difference between the appreciative people and the non appreciative people, the answer will be clear on how the person you do so much for treats you in return. Sometimes we have to let the people who don't always appreciate us learn on there own and realize for themselves how good they really have it. I have found myself in similar situations and eventually I realized that this is my life, I can't make everyone happy but instead I need to make myself happy. I have one life and I should be able to live my life for me, and not everyone else. So if you are trying to help everyone or you are putting other peoples happiness before your own happiness, stop and remember you can't always please everyone. However, you can please yourself and live to make yourself happy then in turn the people around you will be happy too. Do what you want to do and be who you want to be, do not let others control your destiny or have some kind of damper on your happiness. We as human beings have to learn that not everyone is going to be happy but if you want to be happy then that is something you have to do on your own in your own way. To make yourself happy and live your life the way you want to is not selfish, the selfish part would be wasting your time not being happy or living the way you want to because tomorrow is not promised to us. Remember you are only as happy as you allow yourself to be, so you are the remote that controls your happiness. Make you happy and be happy today, tomorrow, and forever!

Could My Mistake Have Messed Up My Fate

The question that really exist is, did I make a mistake and mess up my fate? The catch 22 thing definitely does exist especially when you are dealing with whether or not you should be honest about how you feel. I feel as though if I say how I feel it will mess things up and if I don't say how I feel then it eventually mess things up, so either way things will be messed up. Though it may not be as complicated as I am making it to be, on the inside of me it is as complicated as it seems. If I would have just spoken how I felt, then at this very moment maybe I wouldn't be feeling as though me not saying anything was a mistake. We certainly can choose what our mouths say to other people but can we really choose how things will end up with those people as well. That's the hard part about life, friendships, and relationships our actions and emotions play a very important role on the outcome of these parts of our lives. We, however, can't choose when the beginning or ending to something will be only time can really determine that for us. Though it may have been a mistake for me to say how I feel it could have in turn been a mistake not sharing how I feel, but only time can truly tell. So maybe our mistakes is what make our fate and without them what would shape our lives. Perhaps if we never veered off course we wouldn't fall in love or be who we really are. After all I have learned seasons do change, people come into our lives for seasons and people leave just as quickly as they came. At the end of the day its comforting to know the ones you love and care for will always be in your heart and if your as lucky as I am a plane ride away too. <3